Tag Archive: poetry

what i need today

the night
– is calls with out question
-it seems so absurd
the thoughts
-wonder past recognition
-these visions that conspire
can longer described by mere words

I’m lost in a place with out pleasure
I’m lost in a place with out pain
I’m lost In the place past desire
in the back of my brain

what I want…
I can not place words on
what I want…
I do not know what to say
what I… need
to know where I got these chains from
if only to convince my self I don’t need them today


the lies of wounder land

I should of ran away when I had the time
now I’m lost in your looking glass eyes
slipping down your rabbit hole
watching your childish chaos unfold
just your play thing
as the world goes awry
now I’m late and you wonder why

Your Cheshire cat grin
only more proof of how far I’v slipped into – your twisted wonderland

How much more can I stand
before I no longer resemble a man
-just your little white rabbit –looked inside a cage
all dressed up and ready for your stage
There’s a rip in my reality I cannot mend
as I watch , the way you pretend …to be just a child lost in this land
making us all your play things we’re growing mad
“eat me “, “drink me”
growing mad
shrinking away from what I am
just your Tweadle dumm dum dum –
or your tweadle dea, – growing MAD- time for tea
ship wrecked in the walruses sea

Left as only your white rabbit caught by the ears
how much longer can we go dancing with our fears
Oh! what have you done with the queen of my hearts?
ran away with all the t(h)arts
Leaving me as nothing then the jack of scares

You really fooled us all
just a child having a ball
its realy to late
but now we see
we’ve lost our minds, what’s left of our heads?
– we’re losing our heads, off with our heads

Making us look so mad
because you couldn’t seem to understand
oh how your reflection has shifted at last
Alice … you’er driving us all mad
 please leave our wonderland

but is it too late… alas …alas
a tower of cards – dismembered in a foreign land

empty sea

What churns the insides
like the arctic sea?
The ice shelves crashing
inside of me

When all should be coming
to an endless gleam
something comes running
to invade serenity

If you are a dove
to take me from the dark
I give you all my love
and it seems that’s just the start

You give me all you can
so what can this be
why are the still jutting cliffs
cutting in to me

Why does the vastness
still overwhelm my mind
when you are here to sooth away the lines
stay by my side

If your side I feel safe and calm
why is it that with only minuets alone
the whole world
goes wrong?

With your love so steady
to comfort me
why won’t the emptiness –
let me be

feminine flaw

For all those involved
you know what’s been done
you know of the dark
of the things we’ve become

If you hurt me
who is to blame
isn’t that the question
left in our way

The people before us
say it’s the feminine demise
like we draw out the poison
in an older man’s mind

Like are words are a candy
filled with a taint
and what they choose to do
we brought our way

But the people are saying
from ear to ear
in a movement of whispers
that we didn’t bring our selves here

That the shape of our body’s
or how the fabric plays at our skin
that your deeds should not be our damnation
because you forced yourself in

Because kindness most tender
because of our lack of battle field walls
 should not be considered a crime
it’s your turn to be made small

To feel the weakness
we feel each day
knowing no matter how hard we fight
were small and tender – but u shouldn’t be allowed to have your way

Tell me what I am
for I no longer seem to understand
for as I walk
I only stand
– stuck in shifting sands

I merely come from this race of man
but what is my expectation –
lost in meaningless fixations
my heart can take no more of my minds compensations

My war is so long over
what am I still fighting for
is it this disjointed beating in my chest
that keeps looking for more

For my war is long over
I am not who I was anymore
striving for an endless calm
but the fight is all I’ve come to know

Take me from my temptations
I don’t want them anymore
make me who I was before
– before I realized everything isn’t what it was anymore

The street girl who once saved me
doesn’t live behind those her hallow eyes
something ate into her bones and hallowed her inside
the brother I found in that place of wreckage
soul was claimed by the war

Streets laced with addiction
of temptations
the violence that was seen till eyes grow sore
why do you still reflect on those visions?  – when you don’t see them any more

No longer plagued by the endless addictive fixations
no longer in the place that pain came for –
why do you meander through its battle zone
you don’t come from there anymore


I am but a single soul
that this labyrinth dose behold
not the only wary mind
that seems to slip
that does coincide
within these wall that consume all time

I echo sharply through the abyss
that is tangled within its mists
I am but one measly soul
that this titanic temple holds

I fight these walls that are around me
tear at these bricks that do surround me
for only a breathing thing to clutch to
for an open door I could consistently come to
a warmer place just for me
that when I need I can run to

But in the end
when these tunnels fade from me
I may just beg
beg not to leave

I try not to take comfort in my misery
but at points that’s all this labyrinth leaves to me

For the lady

Lady lady of the night
Who chose the black
Above the light
Who took your heart
Who tore your skin
Who left such scars
Till none could come in
As your hair – falls from your eyes
Could what we see
Be but shadows – left behind
The ones who made
Knives Out of your tongue
Is this what – the worlds done
For these streets – are cold and bare
We will not find
the answers here
As we look – to the past
A broken glass road – without a chance
For all you lost
Still fighting to gain
In the night
With blood read stars
you continue play

old lies

What are these things
inside my mind
within my ears
circling inside?

What are these thoughts
could they be mine
could they be trusted
could they be lies

What are these hopes
but the promise of tears
but the whispers that linger
of old untold fears?

What is this need
for the things deep within
that crawl under the surface
that twist in the skin?

Can I be human
or some other kin
made of destruction
and masochistic whims

Looking for happiness
anywhere but within
too afraid to see
for that’s where they sit

The voices that churn me
for this way or that
saying I can
saying I can’t

Tell me this turmoil
that I can leave it behind that my heart can be trusted
to tell more than just lies

our fears

what can i say for the week
but words a fool would seek

and what is there to be said
when the words that circle in our heads

only tell us of whats not left
for us any more
for the doors have all but closed

and its up to us to know
its up to us to show

why we’re still here
here my dear
for this place will expose our fears
all our fear

its how the gear
how they’ve made it,through the years

by  exposing us to our peers

our fears
our fears
our fears

of simply being alone

learn to sin

“I was so young”…
is no longer enough
to say
to the pain
in the night

sometimes its wrong
sometimes its right
when we shrink within
when we explode into life
but the secrets always lay
– there

I could scream
I could leave
I could just live and be
I could escape and live free
but the past always lay’s on the mind

find me half way
teach me how it is with out the pain
teach that there can be no shame
tell me you know the way
so the secrets – leave my brain

my mind takes a long sigh
tell me its all a lie
as I throw it all in to the night
let the world pass me by
– to-night im letting go

im not giving up
not quit giving in
not a death in the night
simply the surrender to my sins
for heaven and earth is

– simply what we say
– what we make
–  what we know it needs to be
– to live
– to breath