there was once a man- by cj beamish

where is the man who use to call my name once
who’s twisted whispers played upon my ears
in between the lies – some where our love was crucified
on a cross of our fears

the night it plays with our memory
the darkness laces between my eyes
and somewhere in the distance
like a shimmer of the stars there is a vision
but just like the ancient star it is a ghosts light

once we stood clasped together like praying hands
our hearts wrapped together in a desperation  that could not be eased
but as the night grew cold
and hearts cooled from a jealous soul
in your hatred you became hypnotized –
and your pain could not be relieved

do you remember when i asked you not to let me go
do you remember when i whispered for you not to leave
but in the mists of  your betrayals , i parted through midnight vail
and headed for the sea
you never asked me not to go
as i faded did you see
how i hesitated,
in the motions of leaving i still waited
or could you not bring yourself to look to me

do you remember when you loved me
do you think of me as ghost
sometimes does our old love haunt you
does my phantom interrupt you  as you sleep
do you still love me when you dream

in time i have learned to love another
in time i have let our dreams fade away
the man who holds me he is as you were
unable to be tamed
but he does not look for his monster
he does not ever stray
he does not run he keeps me safe here
he keeps the pain away

i have learned to love another
the woman he knows is soft and kind
he does not see the monsters –
that swim in my souls waters
for that i owe,too love being blind

i let him believe he is the wild one
i let him not worry of what I’ve seen
and you would not recognize me
for our old ways iv left behind be
but they haunt me in my dreams


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